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Tuesday, January 28, 2014

More crazed bums

Yesterday I posted a simple quiz that promises to tell you what kind of crazed bum you are. You should go take it, because it's important to know. Anyway, here are the kinds covered in the quiz:



Of course, the emerging field of bum taxonomy is full of examples of other types, but they're not as well-understood as the above three. If you take the quiz and find that the results don't seem to be a perfect fit, you might consider some of these other possibilities:
  • The Storytelling Bum: sometimes considered a subset of the Too Much Information Bums, the storytellers will tell you anything, not just uncomfortably personal information. They're kind of like the Homer of ancient Greece, except their stories probably won't be read by bored high school students in four thousand years.
  • The Trickster Bum: will sometimes try to trick you out of your food or money, but sometimes just wants to mess with you for fun. The Trickster Bums might seem almost sane on the surface, but remember that their entire purpose in life is to break your brain.
  • The Hardcore Bum: these ones are playing on hard mode. They don't complain and most of them don't beg. Even the world of the working class is cushy to them; the hardcore bums live in a world that seems almost post-apocalyptic, scavenging and battling their way through life on the margins, making do with the crumbled remnants of a broken system (how cool does that sound? BRB, becoming a hardcore bum).



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