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Saturday, August 11, 2012

Read this and then go outside and play

The following was going to be a drawing, but you guys can visualize it better than I can draw it.

Mental Health
Scientists were excited to announce the discovery of Homo fabulous, a near relative and contemporary of Homo neanderthalensis. "The fossil record indicates that after a brief few years of bullying from the Neanderthals, H. fabulous enjoyed a period of unrivaled wardrobes and a vibrant club scene," said Dr. Vikram Johnson, adding with a slightly regretful tone, "Only to disappear as quickly as they had come."

Interrogation Tuesday results:

I asked all about social media, especially the idea of 'stalking'.

Have you ever used social media to 'stalk' someone?



Yes2170%
No13%
No, but I've wanted to13%
Other723%

other entries:

  • Anyone who says no is lying.
  • Why should I believe you?
  • I like to call it background checking
  • I have only used social media the way it was intended, to keep accurate records of peoples' "goings on"


Do you consider it OK to do so?



Yes, anyone who puts information online wants it to be discovered1963%
Yes, I would dig through their trash if it wasn't so easily available on the internet27%
No, that creeps me out13%
No, that kind of information should be exchanged face to face310%
Other517%
other responses:

  • Necessary evil.
  • Not really, but that's never stopped me, has it?
  • I like to ask out girls that I already know are as cool as me
As far as creepiness goes, when you start to get nervous? (check all that apply)


Creep has a collection of your hair1554%
Creep has made a shrine with that hair, and candid photos1243%
Creep uses sacrificial goat blood to write your name on the wall1346%
Creep is a locksmith1554%
Your friends all like the creep, think you're being paranoid1450%
Other1243%

other responses:
  • I think you started a bit past the "start to get nervous" point.
  • Remember that this is when I *start* to get nervous. 
  • This stage generally precedes any knowledge of the facts of the preceding options.
  • ALL of the above! P.S. that sounds oddly specific Andrew.
  • Creep knows my name.
  • Creep knows your blood type and social security number.
  • Do you have a lock of my hair, Andrew. DO YOU???
  • All is fair in love.
  • Creep is actually one of my own multiple personalities.
  • The creep is ten years older than me.
  • I can always out creep a creep. I also have nerves of steel.

Anything else you'd like to say?

  • I like the pictures you have on your bathroom wall. Could I have one? 
    • (Well, here's a picture of my bathroom wall)
  • I want to say Everything a la Borgesian libraries.
  • I feel very uncomfortable. Get away from my window. 
    • Oh. I'll come back later, then?
  • 1)Yeah! Stop thinking of creepy answers to creepy questions!
  • Free yourselves, sons of anarchy!
  • Nothing is creepier than that dwight schrute pumpkin you carved in 2007 with your friends Brandon, Steven, and Kyle...
    • I see what you did there.
  • Blubber, nitwit, oddment, tweak
    • Obligatory Harry Potter reference. I wish I knew who you were.
  • Have YOU ever stalked somebody? Also, do YOU ever fill out these things?
    • I'm not going to answer the first question, but yes, I do answer them. Guess which ones are mine.
  • poop
    • Very clever.
  • Now I'm gonna have Radiohead stuck in my head all day.
  • I feel like your a little creepy sometimes....just sayin',
  • I really don't see the problem with following people around with binoculars. I mean, come on, walking around in public they are practically asking for it.
  • Stop me before it's too late.
  • I'm probably a creep then. I wish I was a locksmith.
  • I like pizza.
  • Dear Creeps, We would appreciate if you would leave us all alone.  -Normal people
  • Ping Pong
  • Fragrance-free is not just for houses anymore.
  • Gesundheit

It's too nice of a day for me to worry about formatting all this. Deal with it.

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