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2023-09-27

Sartorial vastness

An advertisement says, "Come on down to Shen's Shirt Barn, home of the Shirt That's Just Way Too Big!" and has a picture of a barn and a person in a cowboy hat and a nondescript T-shirt. Below the advertisement, a person is wearing a shirt so big that it trails behind them on the floor even as they are standing up. The person says, "It'll probably shrink in the wash."

 "What have I done?" I asked myself, and then I looked at the screen and it was this. This is what I had done, and it was too late to make a different thing.

2023-09-25

Banana nomenclature

 

Pictured: an angry banana with a face (the face shows the anger, but the whole banana is angry). Q: What do you call a talking banana? A: Anything you want. Just because it can talk doesn't mean it can move. The banana says, "I am filled with impotent rage."

For Remake Monday, I've improved the wording and redone the coloring but left the 2017 version's Crustacean Sans, which was my second attempt at a handlettering typeface. It turned out better than it had any right to, even though I made it so light that I only ever used it in word processor-simulated bold. (Come to think of it, I could fix that now, although I think ultimately it's too clean compared to QuickClaw, the one I use almost all the time now.)

2023-09-24

Just screaming

 

Panel 1 of 4: a blobby creature in a desolate landscape screams. A stick figure approaches. Panel 2 of 4: The blob and the stick figure both scream, facing each other. Panel 3 of 4: The stick figure explains, "To be clear, I was screaming with you, not at you." Panel 4 of 4: The blob smiles while emitting the same scream as before. But now happy? THE END

Four panels? On my CrustaceanSingles? It may be more likely than you think! (I don't know how likely you think it is.)

2023-09-23

OK

A figure resembling a half-abstractified version of Clippy, the failed Microsoft entity, announces that "Trouble is on its way". A hypercube appears below its speech bubble containing the response "OK." and a mouse cursor approaches the hypercube. Weird, huh?

I've come to the conclusion that if I'm to continue CrustaceanSingles at all, I have to give myself room to make weird nonsense like this. Thank you for understanding.