Living with uncertainty

Mental Health
Later that night, back at the lair, he got down on hand and knee to beg forgiveness. "I have failed you, Master; he would not guess what."
The Master strode out from the shadows, its possessed body's clumsy backwards strutting in no way detracting from the dreadful aspect of this evil being. From the chicken's rear end it spoke: "It is of no importance, Kyle. There will be others who are more susceptible. Others who will ask what. And when they do..."
"Yes, Master. I will tell them: Chicken butt.
A muffled laugh. "And then they will be under my control." 


Who's special? You are!

Fear and loathing in space and time

Mental Health
Roger had, as a younger man, already come to accept the Universe's cold indifference to him and to all life. In fact, he himself responded to it with a general disinterest of his own, and was not on the whole very sad or very happy.
It was quite a surprise, then, when he received a letter sent from the Universe informing him that he'd got it all wrong. Although, the Universe admitted, its general policy towards all life, all matter and anti-matter, and for that matter all of time and space was one of absolute indifference, Roger had earned the rare distinction of drawing its particular loathing.


Drink it in

Mental Health
"Welcome to the Ministry of Truth, Complaints Department. How may I assist you today?"
___"I just wondered if I could talk to someone about some discrepancies I've noticed. That is, between the Ministry's official statements and observable reality."
"I see. Well, this is a common enough question that the answer is right here in this pamphlet. See? 'While it stands 100% behind its official statements, the Ministry of Truth can make no absolute guarantee of the accuracy of observable reality'."
"Is there anything else I can help you with today?"


That's just life

"Believe me, I miss them too. Maybe more than you do. When am I going to get a meal like that again? Not anytime soon."


Final preparations

"Well, I guess next time that will teach you to prepare for auditions, won't it?"



Existence's exigencies

Mental Health
The Universe hoped, before its eventual heat death, to meet (somehow, somewhere out there) another nice universe. Maybe settle down and grow old together. At any rate, to enjoy a little companionship before the end.